I’m sure it said something Regarding my personality, one of my New Year’s resolutions for the past three years has been to “have more fun.” Well, not just for more fun… but for study How to have fun. As a typical Enneagram 3, my strong work ethic sometimes conflicts with my ideas. The ultimate goal of living life to the fullest. So, every January 1st, when I write in my journal about what I want the next year to look like, I inevitably write the following: “More joy, more laughter, more play.”
In the long run, the start of 2024 is already very far away. We’ve flown through winter, spring, and now find ourselves on the verge of fall. It’s arguably the most wonderful time of the year – filled with hope and the promise of warmer, brighter days ahead. But many times, when a few months have passed since our resolution, our motivation slows down. Regaining the same motivation we once felt seems impossible.
I always gravitated toward the more serious. When I have a goal in mind, it’s hard for me to see beyond my carefully crafted plan of action. But in order to be more carefree, I know that breaking this script is exactly what I need to feel more joy in my daily life. When I’m on a long hike or at the beach, it’s easy for me to get into a state where it’s more about enjoying life rather than crossing things off my to-do list. Yes, the beauty of nature tends to awaken this spirit in many of us. But I also think it has to do with the interruption in the flow of life making us feel more alive.
How to start enjoying life today
I downloaded an aptly titled book to kick off 2024 The power of fun: How to feel alive again. Author Catherine Price (who is also the author of another favorite book) starts by breaking down her definition of “real fun.” It turns out that many things we can think Interestingly, upon further inspection, it wasn’t so satisfying after all. She categorizes behaviors like binge-watching shows and browsing social media as “fake fun.”
“Fake fun is numbing and leaves us feeling empty when we’re done. Real fun leaves us feeling nourished and refreshed.
I believe that even when serious things are happening in the world around us, we can express empathy and compassion while also welcoming play and laughter into our lives. Inspired by my reading and experiences, this is how I find joy in the small moments of everyday life that bring wonder and excitement to my life.
Fun is a state of mind
Let’s take an example that most of us encounter every day: making dinner. On Tuesday night, two women cooked the exact same dinner. For example, lasagna. One of them was half paying attention to what she was doing, thinking about a problem at work that day, cursing herself for choosing a recipe that called for layers of noodles/cheese/sauce because she still had lunch to pack, and Emails to reply to, …it’s all a bit too much for a Tuesday.
Other women? She was barefoot in the kitchen, playing music, enjoying the experience of doing one of her favorite things. Maybe she’ll recruit a family member to help her lay the eggs. Maybe she’ll pour a glass of wine and enjoy doing one of her favorite things on a Tuesday night. Same situation, completely different experience.
Or think about the simple act of having a conversation with strangers, family, and friends, it’s something we do all the time. What’s the difference between boring conversation and “joke” conversation? flirt? It all depends on how we choose to look at it.
Real fun is about fun, connection and flow
In her book, Price lists three qualities we must have in order to experience true joy in our lives: playfulness, connection, and flow. Play is about a relaxed and free spirit where you don’t think too much about your daily responsibilities and instead focus fully on what you’re doing.
“When people play, they shine.”
Connection means having a shared experience with another person or thing. It could be a connection with nature, an activity you enjoy (such as painting), an animal, or another person. This happens when a person “joins with someone and at the same time feels completely himself.”
The term “flow” describes the feeling of being so immersed in a current experience that you lose track of time. It’s the feeling of getting lost in what you’re doing – because it touches every part of your being.
If my goal is to have more fun, I can look for experiences that incorporate all three of these qualities, or look for ways to incorporate them more into my daily life. when play, connect, and flow On set we get the magic of real fun.
Embracing the concept of unconditional fun
My definition of unconditional fun is: You don’t need to wait until things get to a certain point before you can have fun. It does not depend on what is happening around us. Rather, it is an inner energy shift—a way of moving through the world that is less dependent on external circumstances. Picture that person who always looks happy. (Drew Barrymore, anyone?) Magnetic, right? I’m always looking for those small moments of joy that can be found even on an imperfect day. When I focus carefully and intently, everything comes to life.
Break the script for more fun
A few years ago, I read and loved a book called the power of an instant. It’s all about how we create more memories and extraordinary moments in our lives. One of the biggest takeaways for me was a concept called “breaking the script.” The idea is that by doing something unexpected, we turn off our autopilot and turn everyday moments into something more interesting.
A “break the script” moment I’ve been embracing lately:
- After dinner, instead of turning on the TV, take a walk in the neighborhood with your family.
- Listening to a great podcast with my headphones on while taking a shower at noon!
- Notice certain qualities about someone in your life and tell them about it.
- replace watch My kids play dodgeball, it’s just nice to jump in and play with them. (It also happens to be an incredible workout.)
- Make great cocktails (or mocktails!) on the weekends.
- Do something you’ve never done before. I’ve always wanted to try rock climbing.
- Create new recipes.
- Read poetry instead of nonfiction.
- Look for opportunities for random acts of kindness. Trust me, they are everywhere.
- While the kids were sleeping in their pajamas, it was announced that we were going to get ice cream.
- Buy yourself flowers – and spend lots of money on peonies.
- Get up early and do morning meditation in the backyard. Watching the sunrise changed my mood throughout the day.
Start saying “yes”
Don’t get me wrong – I’m past the age of embracing anything just because the opportunity presents itself. Instead, what I’m saying is on purpose Yes. This means you’ve thought about the request and reflected on whether it aligns with your current energy or what you want to achieve. It’s all about taking a cautious pause before making a commitment. But once you decide will it support the path you want to pursue? That’s when you can give it your all.
So whether it’s a spontaneous trip, a new job opportunity, or just an invitation to meet new friends for coffee, reflect on what your “yes” really means – and proceed accordingly.
Spontaneity is the spice of life
I also learned in the power of an instant Those novel experiences make time seem to slow down and leave memories in our brains. As children, we experience many things for the first time. Instead of crossing “water the plants” off our to-do lists, we watch the tiny wings of hummingbirds or watch earthworms burrow into the soil. I’ll never forget my mom’s occasional proclamation of “banana splits for dinner!” Of course, it wasn’t healthy per se, but the spontaneity of those nights nourished my spirit in a way that broccoli never could.
I wonder, could we not view the unknowns and uncertainties in our lives as “stress” but instead reframe them as opportunities to reconnect with the inner child we live with day in and day out? We couldn’t plan everything then, and there’s a lot we can’t plan for now.
So let’s live life to the fullest. Smile generously, laugh easily, look for opportunities to have fun, and break the rules. Life is too short. I’m ready to have fun.
